THE GATHERING. (26/07/14)

I really wasn’t with it yesterday. I woke up full of the joys of summer this morning but by ten my eyes were back to streaming and my head felt all bunged up. The pictures I took yesterday are not good. I should have taken a polariser and a UV filter but forgot. Having looked forward to this day for weeks it was a disappointment. Not through any fault of the weather, the organisers, audience or the competitors, all four were working in perfect harmony. It was just me. I was a Muppet. Jam packed the place was. I’ll re-phrase that…..The place was jam packed. I know that is how it should be written but I don’t speak like that.

  The massed band of Sutherland Schools. I thought they were brilliant, smart, tidy and made a grand sound. I’m not fond of the sound of folk annoying sheep but if you like that sort of thing these children did it to perfection. You will have to imagine the sound. I did try for some video. I couldn’t see the screen because of the sun so whilst I was twisting this way and that to see I just got heads and feet and grass. I did get focus eventually but by that time they had marched past. I did get some funny looks. The old lady standing next to me said have yoose just been clegged. Crafty lass, she needed someone to lean on. I walked her within hearing distance of the dancing stage, kicked a young lass off a chair and sat her down to listen to the addresses.

    These are the Addresses. The chairwoman takes ages to go through all the births and deaths. Whilst the Clan Chief stands looking sombre. Don’t know why? He is the local undertaker. Clan Chiefs are now elected here which is a step in the direction of democracy. She then spent ten minutes extolling his virtues before he got his turn and declared the Games open.

     This is a great moment the heavies warming up. They can do this anywhere they like but when competing they have to do it in an expensive cage.

      This is to protect the public and little children who run onto the field. This cage was very expensive. The safety Elves said the committee had to get one. I am daft but I’m not daft enough to stand anywhere near a twenty stone man throwing cannon balls and big hammers about. If anyone gets hit then they deserve to be deselected from the human race.

Now; what all you athletics fans have been waiting for. A fit lass in sunglasses.

  The big girls racing. I did catch the winner for some portraits but she was a useless poser she kept pulling faces, glasses up and glasses down, I was starting to get fed up. She made me delete them. I always give folk the option. She didn’t like these she said she looked like a flapper. I struggle with the dialect but assured her she looked nothing like any Slapper I had seen. Told her she was drop dead gorgeous, that's when she introduced her better half. She came third but won the ladies hill race. A marriage made in heaven?

   I’ll leave you on a noisier note. A young lad tuning up his pipes before going on stage for his moment of glory.

Sorry I wasn’t feeling better. It should have been a great day and apparently it was. It was just me being out of sorts.