SUNDAY AND MONDAY. (24/03/14)

It has been a superb couple of days, sunny, little wind, I can see the Cuillins of Skye and all is well with the world. Yesterday lunch time an old chap and his wife pulled up with a caravan. They couldn’t get the hitch to release. I’d got Bertha set up for some semi-serious birding but spent a couple of hours dismantling his tow hitch and reassembling it with dry lubricant. Then his jockey wheel fell off. Nowt to do with me. I went to the croft and fortunately they had a trolley jack so that was sorted in minutes. His van is about forty years old and has had a modernish hitch fitted. Daft old beggar had been greasing it and anything fitted with plastic bearings should not be greased. They expand and jam the job solid.

I looked up the cost of a new hitch and told him I’d order him one. He couldn’t understand how I knew how much they cost and when it would be delivered so he came and squinted at my laptop, twisting his head this way and that then went and fetched Moira his wife. She was on the ball and had all her marbles. She says it’s easy you gives him £300.78p and he tells the man behind the screen to send it here. Then the man here fits it for us. It’s arriving early afternoon tomorrow, I’m £300.00p down and still have to fit a tow hitch. I went to bed wondering who between us was the daftest.

  The sum total of my birding. A Herring Gull or a gull.

The dogs helping to bird……”What are we looking out for?”

Sunset on Sunday over the Small Isles. They were both shot minutes apart. The first is HDR Tone mapped from three images the second is A two stop under exposure for all but the sky and then the foreground was pushed two stops with the selection brush. I much prefer the latter but there is little to choose.

Dawn on Monday. I silhouetted the foreground as it shows lots of rather seedy timber frame houses and static caravans. They are a feature of the Scottish Highlands. Today I’m reflecting the positive side of life.

The Cuillins of Skye and a Gull.

We came back and I fed the dogs, I had my breakfast early. Then I thought it’s a grand day we will walk into Arisaig. It’s only a couple of miles by road and I fancied a Telegraph and needed fresh milk. I wish I hadn’t bothered with the Telegraph. Sam Cam the spouse of Dithery Dave was out for a wee jog. It was something to do with Sports Relief. She would be better employed running in her red layette for Comic relief. Dithery would have trouble penetrating that socialist red outfit. I would but would request she removed it or pour me another drink. Perhaps she has a sense of humour. Dithery and his mates have but theirs is crueller than mine. I help the rare number of people that I find who are less competent than I. Dithery and his mates think it is acceptable to just help themselves.

       This is a war memorial. I find it fitting. I’m ducking the job. I don’t understand it. It does point east. Towards mainland Europe. It was erected in 2009 to commemorate all the Czech SOE folk that died fighting Nazi Germany.

(What is it about Germans? Why did I qualify the noun Germany with the noun Nazi? I met several climbing and they were fine, there is something amiss because they don’t play rugby. They do sail boats but only in the Baltic and not singlehanded across oceans. After years of trying to forgive them I have come to the conclusion that they are just a pain in the ass that should have been defeated and not re-united. They are dangerous en mass. Merkel thinks she can rule the world thinking like a Saxon. A charming fool she is.)

They were trained here but looking at the number of names of the dead on the side panel they were trained in a hurry. I have never experienced proper war but I used to play rugby and squash and ski hard and training time was limited for my hobbies. I like this as an edifice but dislike Czech and Scottish politicians sticking their names on it. Self aggrandisement is what it is. Matters nothing to those that died but it detracts from a thank you stone.  

   I had just taken this picture of the boneyard at Arisaig when John and Moira of the knackered caravan drove past, tooted and waved. I thought miserable sods. A Fiat 500 pulled up ten minutes later and a vision of drop dead gorgeous and veritable clouds of curly black hair; asked if I’d like a lift back to the van. I said how do you know I have a van. Suspicious I am. My mum always said don’t take jelly babies from strangers. She said Grandad has asked me to pick you up. I thanked her and said we’re enjoying the walk. I didn't want her thinking I was old. Silly really, just as I know she is young, beautiful and possibly annoying, she can see straight away that I’m old. At least as old as her parents and I bet she found them a trial. Nice to look at though, a fillum star she was and without so much as an eyebrow plucked. Things worked out fine, when we eventually made it up hill and down and got home and before the kettle boiled she was round and gave me £350.00p in cash. She is sending her husband to help me fit the new hitch. I hope he is young and strong and an artisan. I hope he is busy. Dream on, dream on. It is not nice getting old and having to look at nubile ladies. It would be a whole lot worse if there were none to look at.

Have a great week. It’s a long post but it is my diary and not yours. Have fun.